A Year of 21 Days: Beauty (Day 3- Good Not Harm)

March 3, 2013

Proverbs 31:12

She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

I think the wording for this portion of Proverbs 31 is telling.  It doesn’t say, “all the days she knows him” or “all the days she is wed to him”.  Before a woman even knows her husband, she brings him good, not harm.

First, please understand that I know as well as anyone that you can’t go back and change your past.  If God would give me a time machine, time turner, do-over, or Ghost of Christmas Past, I would take it in a heartbeat!  He doesn’t, though, so everything I’m saying here can only be applied from here on.  That doesn’t change its relevance.

Every single action in my life, including what I do when I am single, will affect my future husband (or current husband).  That one bad night in Vegas?  That might result in a bad marriage, pregnancy, STD, or just a drunken night on the town (with pictures).  The bad marriage will be baggage you might bring to your future marriage.  The pregnancy is either an abortion or a child that will follow you the rest of your life.  The STD will affect any future partner.  The drunken night on the town might affect him when he applies for a local political office or a spot in the church elders.

It’s sobering, isn’t it?  As I go back through every action in my life, I realise that there are at least three people being affected: me, God, and my husband.  (It also affects my kids, but we’ll stick with the husband for now.)

Beauty comes when your actions affect your husband in a positive way.  When something you do has a positive impact, then you can say your actions bring good, not harm to him.

For those (like me) who are divorced, here’s a hard one for you: your actions should still be bringing good, not harm, to the man you married.  Ouch.  Besides the obvious fact that what I say and do to my ex affects my children, what I say and do will still affect him.  I am not good at this one!  I try to limit what I say about him, but I need to actually be bringing him good??  I’m going to need a little help with this one, God.

If you keep your focus on God, doing good to your husband should be easy.  If, however, your focus on God slips, sometimes it’s helpful to me to at least consider that another human being might be hurt by my actions.  I hope I bring my husband good… today and every day.


Omega-3 fatty acids are needed by the body to run efficiently; our bodies don’t produce them.  Not only do they lower triglycerides, the risk of stroke, and have other benefits that testing still hasn’t proven, but they have beauty benefits, too.  It regulates oil production, keeping skin more supple, prevents acne, and delays the skin’s aging process to prevent wrinkles.

The best sources of Omega-3’s are fatty fishes, fish oils, flaxseed, and flaxseed oil.  Most of us don’t get nearly enough of any of these; 400-1000/mg a day is the recommended minimum.  Try adding a supplement, but also try things like having fish on Fridays, adding flaxseed to your oatmeal or yogurt in the mornings, or using fish oil in your cooking.  Every little bit helps.

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